"With or without friend ? What question is that ?"

I know- yes I know you'll think that way. But for me, it's still a question that you have to ask yourself. You may be lucky to have friend(s) in your life but some people will hope they'll never have a friend like him/her.

Why ?

FAKE people and everything's FAKE. There's nothing original. I'd always hope I can have someone who's truly understands you without being freaking fake asking whether you're okay or not and then said anything bad behind you. Oh GOSH, what kind of 'friend' is that ?

I often asked myself about this. Do I deserve to have a friend ?

I've lived 19 years old-without having a truly friend besides me. Instead, I have various types of friend(s) you would like to know. I've had a betrayer, a story maker, a liar and even a traitor. What a sad life of me. That's why I never called someone-close yet not so close with me as a friend. Not even bestfriend.

BESTFRIEND ? LIKE SERIOUSLY ???!

Allahu. That's why I love to keep the problem myself- I won't tell other people about me- my problem because I hate expressing/confessing/telling something that waste my saliva-to those people who pretends to listen and understands when they're actually not.

I hate to think about this nonsense stuff. Seriously. I don't care what they think about me- I mean that's my personal stuffs and I don't share with those who doesn't trust me (And I don't trust em either)

WELL, I guess that's all for now. Everyone's mood in this house is damn bad. I don't know what to do or what to say- just sit by myself and writing something. It's not a goodbye, I'll come back later.

NHA